Straight A's: Leaders of the New Cool
By: Khnum “STIC” Ibomu of Dead Prez
Back when I was in high school I had a friend who was an A, honor-roll student and the starting quarterback, and who drove his own Benz to school daily. His wealthy father imposed extremely demanding expectations on him that were taking a toll. One day he got a B on his report card and was so frustrated and ashamed that he would disappoint his father that he went home and took his own life with a shotgun.
Teen life can be fun and some of the best years of life, but dealing with grades, family expectations, busy schedules, college prep, puberty, peer pressure, bullying, sexual anxieties and so on can become very stressful. Without practical tools many teens can become deeply angry, depressed or even suicidal.
The great news is that there are simple practices that can be helpful. The following is an All- As Approach for staying on your emotional A game:
Awareness
We can only manage what we are aware of. When in a funk, practice taking ten to thirty slow, deep breaths, and just allow yourself to become aware of what you are feeling. Identify the emotions by a specific name. Note whether it is sadness, anxiety, anger, or a combination, or some other specific emotion. This is a reminder that we are not our emotions and thoughts; we are that which witnesses them. Emotions are great soldiers but you are the general. Adding a daily meditation practice takes your awareness and cool to the next level.
Acceptance
Acceptance means not avoiding, ignoring or denying reality. Acceptance frees the mind from suffering resentment and allows the space for new solutions to emerge. The one who finds value in all things is indeed wealthy. Challenging emotions are valuable. They inform us that something needs to change either in our situation or perspective, and oftentimes both. When we take breathing breaks to settle and clear the mind, and accept the moment for whatever it is, negativity separates on its own, like oil does in water, setting up the alley- oop for taking constructive action.
Action
How we manage our perspectives and respond to circumstances makes all the difference in the world. We can’t choose the direction of the wind but we can learn to adjust our sails. Activate new habits and hobbies, and ask for help when needed. Taking action is about choosing to focus your energy in ways that help you feel good, inspired, and in the driver seat of your life.
Awesome examples: Volunteering. Exercising. Journaling. Redecorating your room. Making new friends. Collecting positive affirmations. Playing your favorite songs. Praying. Talking with a friend, parent, mentor or therapist, and so on.
Awareness, acceptance and action help us ace the life tests that matter most. Keep your A game tight, kick ass and stay awesome!
Khnum “STIC” Ibomu is a hip-hop artist, athlete and author of The Art of Emcee-ing: A Guide for the Aspiring Hip Hop Artist.
